Another cold, grey day in London! Well . . . it's winter, what do I expect? I've just done my practice routine, finished two new songs and created a fresh arrangement for another - a good mornings work.
My youthful routine included a serious dose of 'fame/commercial success' worry as well.
I don't do that anymore.
It's not that I've changed into another person with no serious ambition issues, it's just that I've realised making good music/art is what's most important to my mental and physical health. Trying to be a star got in the way of that most of the time.
I spent too many years unhappy about not acheiving my goals - they were outrageously lofty. When it looked as if I was about to reach them (Carmen) I realised it wasn't making me happy or satisfied. That realisation, along with a load of music biz hard ball bullshit, was a major factor in our disbanding.
Now, the sheer joy of singing with a voice I always used to aspire to - cancer of the throat and the subsequent operation and treatments are part of that - is good enough. I don't get depressed or jealous when someone I do or don't know is getting further ( maybe a leetle bit ), faster in their career! I'm pleased with where my journey is taking me.
So I wish luck and joy to everyone out there who's making music/art and doing it because it's their passion! D